The Bear Who Cried Death

Our story begins
With a bear named Doofus.
He went to school at Higgins
And then moved to Woofus.

His real name was Ben
But Doofus was always
Denser than a confused hen;
Very dumb in all ways.

"Death of the fish!"
Ben cried when he had found
Fish swimming in River Wish,
For he had thought they drowned.

"Death of the skunk!"
Ben cried. He located
Horrid smells of the striped skunk,
Whom he thought suffocated.

"Death of the bird!"
Ben cried, hearing squalling
Birds flying overhead and heard
The tweets of them falling.

Doofus was so dumb
That when on his deathbed,
A happy tune he did hum
Until he was quite dead.

(He thought it to be
The best day of his life.
Today you have seen why he
Never had a good wife.

So be it!)